Then there are ‘descriptive’ titles.
Now, forgive me for being Mr Picky, but surely a descriptive title should tell you what the workout, technique or theory does that others don’t?
The one I have heard a lot over the past 5 years or so is ‘Metabolic Training’.
What the heck does that mean?
Is it suggesting that if you use this training you will raise your metabolism?
Is there any form of training that doesn’t raise your metabolism?
Getting out of a chair or going for a walk will raise your metabolism!
If we are talking raising it and keeping it raised beyond the scope of the workout, then any anaerobic training, HIIT or heavy resistance training will do that (a lot more than these faddy workouts ever will).
What it is really referring to is EPOC (Excess Post-exercise Oxygen Consumption) and the creation of an Oxygen Debt. But, there is no one ‘magic’ metabolic training method that makes that happen above all others.
Another is ‘Endurance Training’!
Could you be a bit more specific?
Mostly this is used to describe high reps. But sitting in a freezer to prep for a trip to the Arctic would be endurance training, or hill walking could be endurance training.
In fact, almost anything that will last (or endure) could be considered endurance training.
Endurance for what?
And then there is ‘Functional Training’!
Are there actually programmes and workouts that are planned to be dis-functional?
Ok, there are plenty of ‘coaches’ out there who deliver such things, but they think they are doing something positive. It’s just the reality is they are just being weird and dangerous for the sake of individuality.
Then there is ‘slim-a-size’, ‘yummy bummy’, ‘slimfast diets’… and on and on…
In the end, it is just sticking fancy labels on things to hide the fact that there truly is no substance to it.
It just sounds good.
Training is not done just for the sake of it.
It is done to achieve something.
So, there should be some thought behind why you are doing things.
Just realize, there is very little that is truly new.
Things that work are the things that last, not fads or gimmicks.
If it has been done for decades there is likely a reason. If it is shiny and new, it is likely either a re-hash of something old or is untested garbage with a well marketed visual image.
Even the tried and tested stuff can get irritating when people walk around the gym talking about their latest 5/3/1 routine, 5×5, German Volume Training or Russian Strength Sets as if they are something new that they just invented.
If you haven’t heard of any of these, you may want to check out Jim Wendler’s 5/3/1 programme as a solid option if you don’t know where to start with your strength training.
These are all reasonably good workouts with solid benefits, but to treat them like they are the latest ‘miracle’ and the fast track to a ripped physique, huge growth or a shredded six pack, that’s just bull crap and cause me switch off.
So, here’s a shiny new technique for you.
It’s called ‘Metacolonic Training’.
It is where you take your metabolic training, your Superhero Workouts, faddy diets, gimmicks and your quick fix solutions and you shove them up your…
That’s my view anyway – perhaps you like these gimmicks, or you have actually seen some staggering results from them.
Or are you as frustrated as I am with hearing this nonsense day in and day out?
I’m sure, regardless, you will have heard of at least a few of them.